It often seems as though my hubby has a death wish.
I mean, there can't be any other explanation for certain circumstances.
For instance: I’d just put down our baby to sleep after 45 minutes of rocking and shushing. My back was killing me and I was pretty out of breath. And suddenly, I hear blaring music from the other room. I know it's accidental because the volume is quickly reduced. I imagine his panicked face and almost feel sorry for him. Almost. Then I revert to the thought of killing him. He isn't in my shoes, I tell myself to remain calm. Only an exhausted parent who’d been with a fussy baby all day long knows the feeling of finally putting that baby down to sleep…in those moments, all I’m thinking about is how I’ll soon be drinking a relaxing cup of tea before my own bedtime. I wince and curse as I watch her push up on her forearms to see what going on.
I shut my eyes tightly and pray,
Go to sleep
Go to sleep
Go to sleep
I open one eye - Thankfully, her head drops back down and I breathe out a sigh of relief… I ninja out of her room and walk over to ours and whisper, “You almost died tonight.”
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